After I read this book, I immediately climbed into bed and stayed perfectly still. My wife called my name, but I didn't answer. When she walked into the room and saw me on top of the covers not moving with my eyes wide open, she thought I was dead, but she was wrong. I wasn't dead, I was funny! Marc Carvajal is the master of what is funny and what isn't. As you read through the pages of this book you will be picking up tips that will change every interaction you have with anyone from this point forward. My advice is to keep a clean pair of underwear nearby because you will be peeing yourself from laughter. (See, before I read this book I would never had written that sentence. Funny!) If you are completely unfunny, this book probably won't make you funny after you read it. But, you don't have to be able to play basketball to enjoy watching Michael Jordan play... croquet. (Funny!) Marc is the Michael Jordan of funny. When he explained the humor of Police Academy it was like someone flipped a switch in my brain. Now I understood why I was laughing, when before I just laughed when everyone else did. Now, my hobby is writing funny emails that people can forward to one another. My most popular one was "10 Ways To Tell If Your Cat Hates You." The number two reason? You find kitty litter in your grape nuts. (Funny!) The number one reason? He rapes you at night when you're asleep! (Funny!) Well, now I turn you over to the master! Prepare for you to be funny! About Myself
Right now as you are reading this there is probably someone out there making about 4 or 5 million dollars by simply being funny. While you sit there, with-I don't know-a soda or beer or something in your hand, laying in your cozy bed with your comforter, probably a down comforter too, someone is simply being funny and they're making more money then you. I'm not saying they're having fun, granted you. I'm saying they're working hard at being funny. But, nevertheless, they're making money being funny. How does that make you feel? Now just sit there and think about that. How do you like that? Does that make you feel good? Does it make you feel good knowing someone's making more money than you (lots more money then you) by doing something that just comes natural to them? Don't read on until you think about that.
Well, maybe I shouldn't have said, "comes natural" in that last paragraph because, chances are, they had to work pretty hard at it. To me, being funny is natural. I don't feel like I had to work hard at it. Sure, when you finish reading this book, or even before that, you're going to think I worked pretty hard at it, that I did everything I talk about. But the thing is, if someone wouldn't have asked me to write this book-my agent-if he wouldn't have asked me to write this book, I wouldn't have even thought about any of this. What my agent said was: "hey, man, you should write a book about being funny, you know, because you're so funny." I have to admit, when he said that, I didn't think I should do it. Partly because I didn't think I wanted to spend my time trying to tell people how to be funny and partly because, well, I didn't want to give away any secrets.
Let's face it, if you follow everything in this book I'm talking about, (I wouldn't not suggest memorizing it, it couldn't hurt.)--If you know this book better then a mother knows her young, I'd say you have a real good chance of being funny. I'm not saying you're going to be making money at it, but the chances of being funnier after reading this book than you were before reading it are probably 13 to 1. Now if you've taken lots of math, like I have, you know that's pretty good odds. And let's face another thing: this isn't a theory book. There aren't any theories to someone being funny. Either someone is funny or they aren't. There's no in between. Think about your own life. When you go see someone who makes you laugh-which rarely happens today because there are very few funny people out there (I go into that later on my chapter on who I consider to be funny) you either laugh a lot or you don't laugh. You don't say, "that was funny no it wasn't yes it was no it wasn't." Does that make sense? Anyway, like I said, this isn't a theory book. It's pretty straightforward. It's not like one of those stupid philosophy books by Neeche. Those books are so stupid and boring. I read one once that said, "man is born free but everywhere he's in chains." What the hell does that mean? Oh right, I forgot, it doesn't mean anything. Being funny isn't some dumb philosophy; it's pretty straightforward. It's an exact art. If you don't agree with some of the things I say, then why aren't you ever in the newspaper? Sorry to be conceited but that's just how it is. I don't think I'm conceited, just confident. But, I get into that later on in my "what to say chapter." But like I was saying, I didn't have to work hard at being funny. That's a rare thing, I think. Most people really got to work at it, you know. Those good stand-ups--that's not something you just decide to go out and do. It takes lots of concentration. It takes eating the right foods (lots of beef for one thing, but I get into that later). But, like I was saying, for me, everything just sort of happened. I don't want to say everything just "fell into my yard" like that expression goes, but I guess that's not a bad way of describing all of this. It's almost like there's a big gap-a canyon-between the last time I remember saying, "oh this is pretty funny, this stuff I'm doing" you know, as a kid, and the time I said, "wow, a check for seven grand after doing a two hour gig, not bad." But, this book, I think, tries to take apart that whole time frame and look exactly at what I did to make myself funny. It's almost like those diagrams you see of a smoker's lung, how you see it at one stage and it's all clean and then at another stage and it's darker then at it's final stage and it's all black. You try sometimes, to say, "well, how black was my lung getting there?" That's what I try to do with this book. I try to look at a certain time and say, "how was I developing as a funny man right there?" And I say man because I mean a man in a woman-dominated society. No really, though. I don't want to seem down on people but that's almost what you have to do when you get to my stage. In this book, I'm nice. I really want you to understand things. I respect that, since you picked up this book, you really care about trying to be funny and have a respect for all of that. And good for you, if you think that, because being funny is a great thing. It can bring a woman into labor, it can make people forget about their low-paying jobs, it can be used in prisons. Now, if you took one of my workshops, things might be a bit different. I, once, in one of my workshops, shouted at a 12 year-old girl studying to be a comic. I must've shouted at her for at least an hour or two because she just didn't get what I was teaching her-I think it was pro-forma acting, something I get into in my exercises chapter. Her parents understood, but she didn't. One thing with students is that they always want to know, "hey, was this funny?" I tell them the same thing every time: "If I laugh, then you know it's funny." That makes sense doesn't it? Isn't that a good yard stick to use? Makes sense to me. But I get some students that still want to know if they were funny after I've been quiet through their whole routine. That's like going up to someone and asking them if they're sad while they're crying. . * Copyright 2003 Marc Carvajal Email the author if you are interested in learning more! |